Flying High

“If your lucky the baby a few rows up will cry the entire flight up to Portland today,” the flight attendant said with a tone of annoyance. “On an earlier flight this morning we had a baby cry the whole flight over and it was miserable for us. I don’t have any kids myself, but if I did I would bring cheerios on the flight,” he continued proclaiming to the passengers sitting near me.

I was already in a bad mood and this made me a bit more irritated. I don’t stick up for those who have babies in their laps on my flights. I don’t feel any sort of special connection with them. I don’t have any kids. It’s the fact that the flight attendant made an idiot out of himself and possibly embarrassed the young mother sitting ahead of me two rows. While my fellow passengers chuckled and offered their two cents on traveling with kids, I tuned them out while I dug in my bag for my ipod. I need music. I need noise. Anything to drown out the crying thing up front and to lift my mood.

I’m not sure I was supposed to fly today. Nevertheless I am on my final leg of today’s journey but it hasn’t been easy. This is the first time I have ever flown from point A to point B with two layovers in between. I really didn’t mind taking two layovers when I purchased the flight. I’m always up for an adventure. My first layover was in DFW this morning. Due to lightening storms and heavy rains from OKC to DFW my flight was delayed. Upon arrival into DFW I had to run to another terminal to catch my next flight. Arriving closer to my gate I heard my name being called out over the intercom, “MrT please proceed to gate ## for immediate boarding and departure.”

Side note about me. I HATE my full name being called out in public. I don’t like it. I can’t explain why. Just accept the fact and move on.

As I handed the gate agent my boarding pass she asked me about three other passengers who were supposed to be on my flight. She asked if I had seen them in the airport. I held back my annoyance with her and nicely told her that I knew no on in the airport and therefore didn’t know who else would be on my flight this morning. It took her a few seconds to grasp the concept but she handed back my pass and pointed the way for me to find the airplane door. While walking down to the plane I realized that my name was the only one broadcast to the entire airport though there were three other people needing to get on my flight. Why me? Upon finding my row I noticed several seats empty on the plane so I proceeded back to a row of 3 empty seats. Maybe my day would turn out better. I made myself comfortable stretching out on all three seats while I quickly glanced at my itinerary. It was then that I noticed I didn’t have another boarding pass for my next leg of the journey today. San Diego to Portland.

Arriving into San Diego I experienced the worst airport, besides Kansas City, in the years that I have traveled. There were no monitors to be seen so I could look up my flight information. I asked a gate agent and he couldn’t help me since I would be transferring to a different airline company for this last leg. I walked around and around and finally found four monitors that listed a severely small amount of departing flights. It was there that I begin to think I had to walk or ride to a different building to find my next flight. I slowly made my way out of the terminal and found myself at baggage claim. I stopped by to see if I needed to pick up my bag. I didn’t recognize any thing so I followed signs pointing the way to terminal one. There I found my next flight company and stood in line.

40 minutes passed and I didn’t move in line. I huffed and puffed and often changed which leg I put my weight on. My flight would be leaving in 20 minutes and I still had no idea what I was doing. I finally stepped out of line and cut in front of a few people to demand attention from a ticket agent. After telling her of the horrible service I encountered thus far she kindly helped me learn that OKC forgot to give me the third boarding pass and that now I have to go stand in line for security and head to gate 16. I run over to the security line and see that it’s going nowhere. I walk up front and ask the agent if I may cut due to my flight leaving in seven minutes and he won’t let me. I angrily walk to the end of the line and wait impatiently as the line sloooooooooooooooooooowly moves. Again I find myself huffing and puffing. I finally made it up to security and watched as two passengers were allowed to cut in order to make it to their flight. I think they were allowed to because of the low-lying shirts they were wearing along with their tacky colored hair. It looked like the two female passengers were taking a weekend jaunt from the retirement village to have a rendezvous in Palm Springs.

As I take off my belt and slide my shoes off again I hear over the loud speaker, “MrT please proceed to gate ## for immediate boarding and departure.” The older business woman in front of me takes her sweet time and fills up four boxes of things she doesn’t want to have in her bag as it passes thru the x-ray machine. She had two laptops. Who travels with two laptops? I’m so close to the gate, yet I’m moving nowhere when again I hear my name and announcement broadcast to the entire town of San Diego.

Eventually I make it thru security clearance and run to my gate only to find the door has been closed. The agent at the desk notices my frantic running and only says, “tell me you’re not on this flight!” I unfortunately have to break her heart and tell her I indeed am supposed to. She radios to someone who gives her permission to open the door and walk me out. I end up standing on the edge of the ramp (which has already been pulled back from the plane door) while it moves forward as the plane door swings open to let me in. I am greeted with a smile and welcomed aboard.

I settle in for the flight as I buckle my seatbelt and slide my bag under the chair in front me. As I sat back upright the head flight attendant came onto the loud speaker and said, “we all want to welcome MrT aboard today. Though you all have seen the emergency presentation, please sit back and watch again while I inform MrT”

I’m going to work on a fake name this week. From now on if my friends or anyone else needs my attention in public they can use my alias name. Any suggestions?