Three Words
He’s professed his love to every single girl he dated. He says there are no rules when it comes to love. No rules to saying the three famous words….I love you. You know when the timing is right according to him.
I can’t say them and I won’t say them…these three words. He says them just as easily as it is for me to sneeze in the morning after sleeping thru the dark night with my window open.
There are rules in my thick book but none in his. I could probably sit him down and graciously point out every rule there is in the book of love, but he doesn’t care to see the obvious. He is the example of love being blind.
I asked him what his rules are this evening and that’s when he stated there are no rules. “It’s never too early and it’s never too late to express your love. But once it’s over you should never go back. It’s all a beautiful frustration,” he said. “If I did have to create a rule book the first rule would be to love yourself.”
Rules are made to be broken in my book. I often break them. I’m not a fan of rules but they are a part of daily life. They determine the time I wake up, the way I earn a small paycheck, the way I drive down a narrow street, and the way I treat my neighbors.
Breaking rules is what makes us feel alive. Human beings need a lot of things to feel alive, including love, but ultimately it comes down to having a heartbeat. When our hearts are threatened we either run or attack.
Love is essentially an abstract concept, easier to experience than explain. I don’t think most women want to hear a guy explain that love is ultimately a feeling of having your soul sucked down into a vortex. Before we know it we have to give up our chance of watching the basketball game on TV because this love has caused an interference with the simple things in a guy’s life. So we stick to using the abstract concept….feel our love and don’t have me explain it.
I realized all this as I sat and listened to him banter back and forth on his rules of love. He sat there laughing at some good memories and shaking his head at the bad ones. I sat there laughing at him for having shared his love with so many girls. So much love was given yet none of it worked out in the end.
Lucky for me he’s staying around town for a bit longer. I’m going to teach him to be a runner next time his heart is threatened. I’ll teach him how to read time correctly so when the next girl walks into his life he’ll eat some Rolaids instead of thinking it was his heart that skipped a beat.
Instead he’ll now know that was his heart beating. It's whats needed to tell him he’s alive and to keep on walking.
I can’t say them and I won’t say them…these three words. He says them just as easily as it is for me to sneeze in the morning after sleeping thru the dark night with my window open.
There are rules in my thick book but none in his. I could probably sit him down and graciously point out every rule there is in the book of love, but he doesn’t care to see the obvious. He is the example of love being blind.
I asked him what his rules are this evening and that’s when he stated there are no rules. “It’s never too early and it’s never too late to express your love. But once it’s over you should never go back. It’s all a beautiful frustration,” he said. “If I did have to create a rule book the first rule would be to love yourself.”
Rules are made to be broken in my book. I often break them. I’m not a fan of rules but they are a part of daily life. They determine the time I wake up, the way I earn a small paycheck, the way I drive down a narrow street, and the way I treat my neighbors.
Breaking rules is what makes us feel alive. Human beings need a lot of things to feel alive, including love, but ultimately it comes down to having a heartbeat. When our hearts are threatened we either run or attack.
Love is essentially an abstract concept, easier to experience than explain. I don’t think most women want to hear a guy explain that love is ultimately a feeling of having your soul sucked down into a vortex. Before we know it we have to give up our chance of watching the basketball game on TV because this love has caused an interference with the simple things in a guy’s life. So we stick to using the abstract concept….feel our love and don’t have me explain it.
I realized all this as I sat and listened to him banter back and forth on his rules of love. He sat there laughing at some good memories and shaking his head at the bad ones. I sat there laughing at him for having shared his love with so many girls. So much love was given yet none of it worked out in the end.
Lucky for me he’s staying around town for a bit longer. I’m going to teach him to be a runner next time his heart is threatened. I’ll teach him how to read time correctly so when the next girl walks into his life he’ll eat some Rolaids instead of thinking it was his heart that skipped a beat.
Instead he’ll now know that was his heart beating. It's whats needed to tell him he’s alive and to keep on walking.
posted by Mr. T at 8:41 AM
6 Comments:
MrT, burn that ridiculous rule book. do you actually need to refer to it from time to time? can't you feel in your gut what's right and what's wrong for YOU?
in my not-as-humble-as-it-should-be opinion, you need to think less, talk less, and DO more. i think you'd like it.
oh, and please note i'm first to comment.
HMPH
Wow, what an interesting place you seem to be in. If only you could find a middle road. One between running from the "vortex" and professing your love on a whim, well, that would be a good place.
I appreciate that you can admit how loving, really loving, a woman can make a man feel. Women are so emotional. I don't mean that to sound as if we are emotional basket cases, but we do so much based upon what we feel. Men are more reserved. Love means letting go and in some instances losing that control we so desperatley need/want. It's like my last relationship. I know he loved me. I know he was in love with me. But because of that he ran away. He finds more comfort in relationships where there is no future. Relationships that are bound to not work out for some reason or another. These are his "safe" relationships. At first, I couldn't fatham this. How could you love someone so much but not let it work? It's taken me a long time but I can now see his fear. He, too, was afraid of the "vortex". I just couldn't understand it being that I am a woman who believed (past tense) that love would get you through.
I think women can be the same way too. I have a female friend who has time and time again dated men with whom she has no future. I believe it's that same fear. Perhaps there's a little of that in me. For different reasons but I can see it. I think I'm just afraid of making a mistake and loving the wrong person. Is that a residual feeling from my last relationship...perhaps. But right now I feel safe in this place. And maybe someday, perhaps on a lovely fall day like today, I'll decide to throw caution to the wind and go for it. I said maybe.
I'll pray that he rubs off on you instead of the other way around.
Oh Matty Tat Tat, those words are coming from a confirmed bachelor if I ever heard them. Love will always be a sucking vortex to you because that's just the cynical way you are. Maybe someday the right girl will change your mind, but I doubt it as long as you have that negative-nancy-baditude.
Matt! I am glad you're writing again! You can come to our house for dinner any night, we usually eat late, and hope you like Rachel Ray cause that's what I'm cooking. Just call and I'll tell you what we're having, there is usually more then we eat! Have a good one!
Michelle
thats deep bro, glad your blog'n again
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